waking up is hard to do...

these are the nights i question. there must be some force looming inside my skull that keeps me awake. it wants something, but it's pride is far too strong to simply tell anyone. it's a puzzle.

we love mysteries.

but then you have to wonder... it's only these nights i find myself drawn so strongly to the words. they drag my hands to the keyboard, my body sits and waits for them to finish their task. that's the way it is. that's the way it's been.

i'm a creature more comfortable within the cover of night. the daylight irks me in a way that i can't fully explain. since i can remember it's been this way, and i've thrived during the hours most people are fast asleep. my body doesn't truthfully begin working properly until the sun has gone down. my thoughts become more precise, i'm able to articulate in a more succinct manner. it feels as if the darkness lets loose some bonds within me and once the sun has fallen behind the horizon completely i can begin.

the sleepers out there, they'd never understand.
i don't think.

for a bit, i envied the people that sleep well. i thought, maybe i'm missing something. it wasn't until recently i came to the realization, it's all of you missing something... but if you knew that, it wouldn't be quite as wonderful. the darkness would be ruined. it's beauty coming from it's absent nature. that is, the absence of life, the absence of futile chaos. don't get me wrong, i'm a fan of random chaos. it's how this world works. but at times, i need nothing more than absolutely nothing. literally. while you all slumber away, the streets are barren, neighborhoods simply sketches of what humanity exists within (if any). buildings shut tightly, parking lots vacated. have you ever been in the center of an enormous parking lot alone? one so large you can't see anything but emptiness to fill? it's a strange and wonderful experience, feeling like the only living creature on the planet.

the darkness is empty. it is void.
as i said; beautiful.

all this simplicity leaves room to breath calmly. it leaves room for the strange and odd, those things too terrified to come out in daylight. it leaves room, and that's enough.